Slow

I have been meaning to post for quite some time now but I have been lazy. Since I am not only single, but refraining from partying and hanging out, I have been spending too much time online. Not only that, but I have a Sidekick phone that keeps me connected when I am out. Its such an odd cycle that I have fallen into. I have so much to type about that I have been holding in..but as usual, when the moment passes I let it go and move onto the next.

My Birthday is this week (feb 15th) and I will be 28 years old. Madness! Now more and more I see how much time I have to catch up on. Its weird because I see Britney Spears doing all of that shit to herself and being this huge mess...but I really sympathize with that woman. She really has been thru a lot and is just doing all of the wrong things because she is so lost in her emotions that she can't see past her pain. That was me last year. Of course on a much smaller scale. I am better now. However, it takes more then just a new year to change everything. It takes time.

Not only does it take time, but it takes a lot of inner strength. As I played thru 2006, I didn't fully grasp how much I would be paying for it in 2007. I put myself in this party state of mind that had me out at least 3 nights a week, drunk, spending too much on clothes (sneakers!) and traveling. I keep reminding myself that it takes baby steps to progress. Its because of this state of mind that I believe that people can change. I have so much faith in myself..I know I can change...I just have to focus.

Valentine's Day is coming up and for obvious reasons I cannot wait for it to come and go. Around this time I can't help but to think of my ex and how this is the time last year (today to be exact) that we broke up. And of course I remind myself that it takes time. It really does...somtimes I cant tell if Im still waiting.

On a random note I am sporting a small hicky on my neck. lol Not something I like but it was worth it.

=)