Waiting

So a new potential "roommate" was supposed to be here at 9pm. He called and said he would be 20 minutes late...it is 10:26 and he is not here. He has called a number of times because he was lost. He said he was in front of our house at "22 Apple St" but we are at "22 Apple Park Ave." He said "It was close enough." WTF!!! Did he think the apartment was going to magically appear on a different street because your stupid ass cannot follow directions?

I want this roommate shit to be done with already. I hate how this happened. Do you know what time it is? Right....

Boston Bridges...

This weekend has been exhausting with looking for a new roommate and catering to a guest. Money is tight and Im realizing that its going to get a little tighter. Yet another lesson backed up with proof: Trust nobody. People no matter who they are or no matter how much they care for you, will walk over you at the drop of a dime. People can be so fucking ungrateful sometimes that you can think things are resolved but when you turn around there is another pile of bullshit to step on. O...and I will never let anybody borrow shit ever again. Not even a breath of air.

Im just so tired of feeling used by everybody around me. Im tired of people coming in here and leaving shit in a mess and not doing shit to help. Im tired of being nice. No more nice. At all. No more appologies either. Tired of sorry people and their sefish appologies. Take that shit into your universe...not mine.

And you thought I was cold before....

Nina Doesn't Like You

We just interviewed another person to fill the room. Yuck. She said "I'll take it..." I had to control myself from giving her a face. That is all.

And Then There Were 2...

I knew this day was coming and I knew it would be like this. But it still hurts. Alot. I walked into the empty room and felt I should take it over because I just cannot imagine somebody else "living" in there. Even the paint has sentimental value. Every brush stroke, every flaw and imperfection from the floors to the cieling and even the windows were a labor of love and unity. Nobody will ever understand the motivation and dedication we had to the idea of having that room become what it was. But I will let it go because it will only hold me back. I cannot live in those walls....because they would eventually swallow me up with emptiness. I can hear my echo in there.....the echo was so loud to me. I sang. And I walked out. How I am gonna sleep tonight is beyond me. Im sure exhaustion will take over... There is only so much my heart can take. Im playing all of my "crying" songs so I can let it all go. Its not going to work. But it will work for tonight.

Goodnight...

This is not a permanent parting. Its more or less a goodbye to a certain part of our lives. We shared alot of great things this year and I am happy that you are moving not only into a different place but a different direction in your life. I do have some mixed emotions about how you are leaving. Happy, dissapointed, sad, scared and excited. If I could just give you some advice: Please learn from your mistakes because they are not few...they are many.

Remember to not burn your bridges and to always be humble and appreciative to the things that people present to you. Be on time because time is money. As cheesy as this may sound...you control your destiny(to a certain extent of course). Things dont always have to end the way they have for you in these last few years. Practice being a little more subtle. Not too subtle because you wouldnt be you anymore. I want you to suceed. I really do.

I feel at times like we are really family and I am so happy to be apart of your life. As frustrating as that can be sometimes. But I know im not a walk in the park either! I am teary eyed right now but I will carry on because things will turn out for the best. I have been quasi emotional lately with all of the departures and upcoming changes. I just really want things to work out. So much I feel heavy with hope and sorrow. I mention sorrow because I know things can get pretty dark before they can get better. ::sigh::

I have to go to bed now. Im looking at what I just typed and its funny but sad. Sad because its messy...which is a perfect reflection of how I am right now.


With All My Love
Mikey.

Ruined.

How much harder can shit get? O yes...this is one of those complaining ass blogs. I have so many emotions going thru me right now. It really sux when the people that you care for are so fucking spoiled and inconsiderate. Im so full of rage that i cant even get it out onto this damn blog. I will sum this blog up with one of my favorite song lyrics: You'll get yours eventually.....

Searching...

We are looking for a new roomate to replace one that is leaving. The soon-to-be ex-roomate and myself are best friends. Love him to death. We walk around this house damn near nekkid and shit so its gonna suck having to lose that privelage. So far we have had MANY responses because we live in a great area that is pretty expensive but our rent is cheap. We do not want any old or fat people...or fat old people. Nobody too conservative...dirty...or ugly. Im sorry but I cant come home to an ugly ass roomate. And they have to love our dog...Nina. Cuz thats the lady of the house.